You never see it coming.


When it all started out, he was a gentleman. He was supportive and kind and sweet. EVERYONE loved him. We thought we loved each other after two weeks.

I felt so strongly for him that I could overlook little warning signs like his ex calling over and over again from a psyc. ward.  “She’s crazy,” he told me, and I believed him. He was the victim in everything. His ex faked being suicidal during their relationship. She tried to ruin his schooling by crying all the time for attention. She tried to ruin his life. I never would have guessed that over the course of the next year, he would say that I was doing all of these things, just as his ex had- not only did he accuse me of those things, but I believed him.


I believed everything that he said about me. I had no idea who I was anymore. I was nothing. I was his shadow. After a few months, if he had told me the sky was orange, I would have believed him.

I will go into each of these steps in separate blog posts to explain exactly what abusers or narcissists or psychopaths will do to their victims.

The steps:

  1. Love-bombing
  2. Losing control of your life: Removal of support systems, destroying any confidence
  3. Crazy-making
  4. Either he will repeat the cycle or get bored and find a new victim.

*Disclaimer* I am not writing this blog for myself- I don’t need to vent, I don’t need to express emotions and I don’t need to whine about some boy- writing these things triggers me and brings back PTSD symptoms- it doesn’t benefit me at all other than letting me help other survivors relate to someone and bring awareness to those who can’t relate. I am writing this blog solely to help others and raise awareness about mental health.  



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